Astray
by ShadowJaySmith
Summary: AU Mon-El has been kidnapped by Cadmus and Kara must find him and relay a message before it's too late. Karamel / Kara x Mon-El
1. Defeated

Her sensible shoes clicked softly against the cement floor. She kept her eyes forward. She was usually one to be scared whilst walking through maximum security prisons, but today, she had something else keeping her safe from fear; there was something inside of her trying desperately to keep her warm, before it burned her alive.

She stepped into the visitor's room, and looked down the aisle, searching for the woman he was hear to see. She spotted her and she walked slowly over. She sat down across from her and picked up the phone, putting it to her ear as the prisoner did the same.

"Kara Danvers," the woman smiled, while Kara looked stony.

"Lillian Luthor." She said tartly.

"I have to say," Lillian sat back in her chair, "you're quite the last person I was expecting to see here."

"Well you got a notice beforehand, so I doubt it was really a _surprise_." Kara snapped, her nose twitching.

"Well," Lillian smiled, "what can I do for you?"

Kara gripped the phone tighter, "You know why I'm here." she growled.

"No, I'm sorry," Lillian leaned forward, close to the glass, "you'll have to tell me."

Kara banged her phone against the glass, making Lillian jump, " _Don't play games with me!_ " Kara hissed, bringing the phone back to her ears, "Tell me _where he is._ "

Lillian smiled that wicked smile again and leaned back in her chair, "Who'd have thought you'd come crawling back to _beg_ me for some _useless_ alien _freak_."

"He's not a ' _freak'"_ Kara snapped, "Now tell me where you've got him hidden and maybe I can make your life a bit more comfortable in here."

"Hm…" Lillian thought, "no."

Kara breathed in heavily, and held her forehead in her hand. "But perhaps if you did me a little favor-"

"- _No_." Kara interrupted, "I will not be doing anything for you."

"Then you'd better kiss your little Daxamite prince _goodbye_." Lillian snapped, leaning close to the glass and spitting the words violently at Kara.

"Goodbye." Kara said, eyes welling up.

She stood, hanging up the phone aggressively. She stormed away, but she could still hear Lillian Luthor's voice in her ear saying,

"I know you can hear me," the smile evident in her voice, "so, if you change your mind, I'll be here, awaiting your response on the edge of my seat."

Kara brushed past the guards and ran out the front door. She walked out into the heavy parking lot, the sun kissing her skin gently, making the wisps at the edges of her hair glow in heavenly light. She sprinted across to her car, feet hitting the pavement heavily. She fumbled with her keys and slid into her car.

Tears sprung heavily to her eyes, and she couldn't hinder them. She put her head against the steering wheel and began to cry. She suddenly remembered the first time she'd been with him in a car; all the silly questions he'd asked, and the bright look in his eyes as he observed traffic signals and the buildings above his head.

The phone buzzed in the cup holder next to her. She jumped away from the steering wheel and closed her eyes, leaning back against the headrest. She snatched up the phone and answered, hearing her sister on the other end of the line.

" _Kara?_ " She asked gently.

Kara sniffed and wiped her nose, "Yeah,"

" _How're you doing?_ " Alex's sympathetic voice should've been soothing but it wasn't; not this time.

"It was another dead end."

" _Oh, Kara-_ "

"-It's fine," Kara said, "we'll just-we'll find another lead-we'll find him-"

" _-We will._ " Alex said, " _Don't give up on him, Kara, not yet._ "

Kara nodded, forgetting her sister couldn't see her. "Okay." she said, her voice cracking slightly and her brows furrowing to try and keep from crying again.

" _Okay._ " Alex said softly, he sorrow heavy in her breath and in her voice, " _Come home and we'll talk more okay?_ "

Kara nodded again, "Okay.

She hung up and started the car, pulling out of the lot and past the guard with ease. She drove down the empty dirt road for a long time. The trees looked peaceful and calm above her head. She pulled onto the highway and sped up. The pavement raced under her tires. She gripped the steering wheel tighter.

She pulled into National City and looked up at the tall buildings above her. She loved looking at them from different perspectives. Today, she had no will to fly above them. She almost wanted to melt into the city and forget about her alter-ego, but she knew she couldn't.

* * *

She flew away from a crime scene as Maggie pulled up in her cruiser, and she soared up into the sky. And after successfully defeating yet another armed robbery, she floated above the city and then stopped abruptly. She'd caught her reflection in a tall building. She hovered in the air and looked at herself. Her blonde hair floated around her, and her cape hung lazily in the breeze. She looked into her eyes, back and forth between the right and left, trying to puzzle something out.

She didn't know what she was supposed to do. She looked at herself, and she didn't see the responsible adult she saw before; she saw a scared kid in a grown-up's body. She couldn't even keep the people she… _cared about_ safe.

" _Kara?_ " Her sister's voice came gently through the comm in Kara's ear.

"Oh-yeah?" Kara broke out of her haze.

" _You okay?_ " Alex asked.

"Yeah," Kara nodded, still staring down her own blue reflection.

" _Go home okay?_ " Alex said gently, " _You need to rest._ "

Kara yanked her eyes away from her own reflection and shook her head, "No, I can't."

" _Kara-_ "

"-We _have_ to find him." Kara said urgently, "I can't just sit around and wait for him to show up."

" _But we have no leads! We have nowhere to look!_ " Alex said, " _You need to rest for when we do find one!_ "

"I'm going to help you find one." Kara said, flying towards the DEO building.

" _Kara-!_ " Alex pulled the headset out of her ear and turned to her sister as she landed inside the government agency, " _Kara!_ You need to stop!" She stood in front of her sister and blocked her from going any further into the building.

"No, I need to-"

"-Find him, yes I know!" Alex said, "But you can't like this."

"Just let me help," Kara said dejectedly, " _please_ , Alex."

Alex sighed and stepped aside, "Alright-but you need to listen to me when I tell you to go home and rest, okay?"

Kara nodded gratefully, "Okay."

They walked into the hub, and Alex sat down in between her and Winn at the computers.

"Hey, Kara." Winn smiled, "I, uh, I've got satellites all over National City looking for him."

Kara nodded, thanking him silently, whilst watching Alex as she began to do other work for the DEO. They sat there for hours. She crossed her arms and rested her chin on them.

They've been doing this dance, on and off for weeks; they spend a long night looking for him, and then the next day, Alex tells her she shouldn't stay with them, and then she eventually gives in.

"What if he's not even in National City anymore?" Kara asked and they both turned to her.

"Cadmus is based primarily in National City," Winn said thoughtfully and Alex nodded.

"But we have no idea just how far they stretch." Kara said and the two agents looked at each other.

"It's worth a shot." Alex said, rubbing Kara's shoulder, and turning back to Winn, "Why don't you widen the search to the desert and see what we come up with."

"Only the desert-?"

"-We'll widen it more later." Alex said, "We can only scan so much at a time, Kara."

Kara nodded and then put her head back on her arms. Her eyelids felt heavy. She'd just close them for a minute, and Alex would wake her if anything changed. She sat up a while later, looking blearily around. The room was deserted.

She straightened slowly. Someone had wrapped her cape around her shoulders like a blanket, and it slipped softly off. She turned and looked around. It was still night time out. She couldn't remember ever seeing the DEO empty like this; they had to take shifts or something.

She turned to the back of the room and looked up at the steps and saw a figure standing there. She stood carefully and watched them. They had their hands in their coat pockets and they were staring at the moonlit city outside. She jogged up the steps and then walked slowly around them to see their face.

" _Mon-El?_ " she breathed and he turned to her.

He smiled, "Hey, Kara."

She threw her arms about his neck and pulled him close. He laughed heartily, putting one hand on the small of her back. She pulled away and then stood there for a long moment; looking into his eyes and reveling in the ghostly feeling of his arms about her. She suddenly realized what she was doing and she pulled away awkwardly, looking around to see if anyone had seen.

"How did you-I mean," she blinked, looking him up and down, "how are you-"

"-I'm not." he said and she frowned,

"What-?"

"-Kara, I don't have much time." He said, putting his hand back in his pocket, "You're going to wake up soon and then you're going to have to come find me."

"I-" She stuttered, looking down at their feet and then back up at him, "I don't understand-"

"-This isn't real." He said and she furrowed her brows even further than before, "I'm missing in the real world." he said with a gentle sort of harshness, "Don't let this dream fool you."

"No," she shook her head, "No! You're here-" she grabbed the lapels of his jacket, shaking him, "- _you're right here!_ " she felt herself beginning to cry.

" _No,_ " he said, grabbing her hands and stilling them on his chest, "I'm _not_."

Her breath hitched in her throat, "But… you _have_ to be…"

He shook his head slowly and rubbed the backs of her hands with his thumbs. "You have to find me."

He let go of her hands and took her head in his, bringing her close to him. He pressed his lips against her forehead, and the motion would've been comforting had she been able to really feel it.

He stepped past her and walked to the balcony. She stood with her back to him, watching her tears as they hit the cement floor.

" _Wait!_ " She turned suddenly and he looked back at her as he stood on the ledge. "I have to tell you something!"

He shook his head, "It's too late for that." He said, "You can't say it until you find me."

"But you're right here," she stepped closer, "maybe I can just _practice_ with you, and then tell the _real_ Mon-El when I see him-"

"-No." He said, "You don't need to practice."

She looked down at her clasped hands and nodded solemnly, "You can do it, Kara."

She looked up at him and a tear brushed her cheek gently. "Go on." He said, and she was suddenly pulled from her slumber by her sister.

"Kara, it's almost three in the morning," she said tiredly, "Winn's promised to call if they find anything."

Kara nodded drowsily. "Come on," Alex rubbed her shoulder, "I'll drive you home."

Kara stood and Alex offered her a hand. Kara smiled sadly and took it, leaning into her sister. They walked out to Alex's car a while later, Kara having changed back into regular clothes. She plopped down in the passenger seat and Alex sat gracefully in the driver's side. She started the car and glanced at Kara wistfully. Her sister only rested her temple against the ledge of the car door, just under the window.

They were stopped at an intersection, cars all around them, people going about their business with no knowledge of anyone else around them. Alex looked at Kara out of the corner of her eye again.

"Kara," she said, looking at the road and adjusting her grip on the steering wheel, "You know it's not your fault right?"

Kara didn't answer.

"Mon-El didn't get taken because of you." She continued gently, fearing her sister would yell at her, "Cadmus took him because they're terrible people, not because you did something wrong."

Kara swallowed and nodded silently. Something felt heavy in her chest, and she thought it must be her heart in there, telling her she's done something wrong.

She looked up at her sister and told a half truth, "I just want him back." She said hoarsely.

Alex smiled sadly, "I know you do." she said, "I just don't want you to feel guilty about something that was beyond your control."

Kara nodded, "I know." She said, "We'll find him."

"Yeah," Alex beamed, rubbing her sister's shoulder for the umteenth time, "We will."

She turned back to the road and pulled through the intersection. Kara's insides felt even heavier than before. She _knew_ it was her heart, and she knew why she felt so damn guilty.


	2. Dreams

Kara walked into her apartment and threw her keys onto the table. She stood in the doorway for a long moment. She looked up and around and then closed the door slowly behind her. She leaned against it and watched her flat, as if she were waiting for it to move. No such luck. It stayed perfectly still, as did the weight in her chest.

It had been a couple days since that night Alex had driven her home, and she'd had the dream about Mon-El. Here she was on a Friday night, coming home from work at six o'clock to an empty house and an empty fridge. She had no life, and no will to go sleep in an awkward position at the DEO, waiting for a sign that may never show up.

She pulled off her coat and dropped it on the ground. She froze, and then turned to look back at it. The last time she'd seen it on the ground was the night he'd disappeared. She swallowed and picked it up, tossing it over the back of a chair and walking to her room. She walked in and stood next to her bed, turning on the lamp. She pulled off her glasses and put them on the night stand. She looked at the bed and felt her body beginning to quiver. She turned away from it and walked into the living room.

She slipped out of her ballet flats and pulled her sweater sleeves, laying down on the couch. She turned onto her side and pulled the blanket over her. She stared at the bed she used to sleep in so easily and remembered why it was so hard for her now.

He'd just met her for dinner, and it had been nice. He liked to hold her hand across the table like people in movies did, and when he'd walked her home, he'd held her hand the whole way.

He'd rode up the elevator with her, and walked her to her front door. When it had come time, he'd leaned down and softly kissed her. She'd let go of his hand and pulled him closer. He'd cupped her cheek so gently, eyes slipping closed in pure, unadulterated euphoria.

She hadn't meant to, but suddenly there he'd been, inside her apartment again, helping her slowly shuck off her coat. It had fallen to the ground behind her. She'd felt so light that night, so free. She'd wrapped her arms around his neck, and he'd guided her backwards into her bedroom.

Her knees had hit the edge of the bed, and together they'd fallen on top of it. He'd lifted her up so her head had been resting on the pillows, and she'd beamed up at him. He'd pulled off her glasses, and ever so carefully placed them on the bedside table. She'd laughed and he'd paused, resting his elbows on either side of her.

" _What're we doing?_ " She'd giggled, stroking his cheek gently.

He'd grinned down at her, " _I have no idea-_ " he'd managed to say before they both started laughing again.

" _I think maybe someone had a few too many drinks…_ " she'd smiled and he'd shook his head,

" _Oh, I disagree!_ " he'd said indignantly, and she'd laughed again, " _I think that you had a very_ respectable _amount!_ "

" _I was talking about_ you _!_ " She'd laughed and he'd grinned,

" _Yeah, I know._ "

He'd stayed there for a long moment, looking down at her dreamily. She'd stared back up at him, waiting for whatever it was he was going to say.

" _Kara?_ " He'd asked, a new timidness in his voice, his eyes leaving hers and moving to where her hands rested on her stomach.

" _Yeah?_ " she'd smiled coyly up at him.

" _I think I'm in love with you._ "

Even now, as she tried to sleep, she could still feel the way those words echoed around in her head. The idea that someone loved her so soon seemed so strange and foreign.

She'd swallowed, " _Wha-what?_ "

" _I think…_ " He'd swallowed and met her eyes again, " _I love you_."

She'd sat up then, and he'd done the same, leaning back and studying her face. She hadn't known how to respond. She'd felt something different with him since the beginning of this affair, something new that she'd never felt before, and she'd never thought really until that moment that it was because she, too, was in love with him. She'd been thinking too hard about it though; she hadn't wanted to say anything as if it would somehow change the way she already felt.

" _Kara?_ " He'd barely whispered.

She'd looked up at him, eyes wide. " _I-_ " she stuttered, " _I don't know what to say-"_

" _-Should I not have said anything?_ "

" _Wha-no! You should! You should tell me how you're feeling I just-_ "

"- _Oh god,_ " He'd stood and ran his hands through his hair. " _I'm so sorry-_ "

" _-No! It's okay-_ "

" _-I just,_ " He'd looked down and then back up at her, " _I should go._ "

He'd turned on his heel and walked quickly towards the door. She'd blinked and then jumped up after him, tripping over the edge of her comforter and falling.

" _Oh_ crap!" She'd cursed, stumbling to her feet, " _Mon-El! Wait!_ " She'd run over and put her hand on the door, "Wait."

He'd avoided her eyes and shook his head, " _I need to go._ "

" _Don't,_ " she'd said urgently, " _not yet._ "

He'd swallowed and shook his head, pulling the door open, " _I gotta go…_ " He'd said vaguely, practically running down the hall.

" _Mon-El!_ " She'd called, stepping outside her flat, " _I'm sorry!_ "

He hadn't turned around, instead walking to the stairs and disappearing into the night. She'd blinked and then turned back to her apartment, closing the door softly and taking a breath. She hadn't been able to believe that had just happened. Her lip had begun to quiver slightly, and she'd lifted her hand to make it stop.

She turned on her stomach and buried her face in the pillow on the couch. Her body shook and she began to cry. She couldn't believe she'd been so stupid; if she'd just been able to get the words out, he would've _stayed_.

* * *

"Kara?" Alex looked up from the computer as her sister walked into the DEO, Winn looking confused next to her.

"Hey," Kara said curtly, stopping as Alex ran over to meet her.

"Kara what-" she paused as someone walked too close for her liking and then began again, "What're you doing here? It's two in the morning."

"Well you're here aren't you?" Kara said and Alex nodded,

"Well yes, but-"

"-Then I want to be here too." Kara said firmly, but kindly.

Alex sighed and then took Kara's arm, "Come here," she said, pulling her sister gently up the stairs and into an empty lab.

Kara looked around slowly as Alex shut the door behind them. "Alex, what's up?"

"I could ask you the same." Alex said, crossing her arms. "I'm really worried about you, Kara."

"Wha- _why?_ " Kara said incredulously.

"You won't take care of yourself, you're staying up way too late and James says you haven't been getting any work done at CATCO." She said, watching as Kara began to pace around, "You're letting this become a crisis that takes over your whole life, and you _can't_ let something do that, Kara!"

"I have to find him!" Kara stopped and turned to Alex, "I _have to_."

"And we _will_ ," Alex said, stepping closer, "but hurting yourself like this won't get him found any faster!"

"I _need to find him!_ " Kara yelled, "I-I-I have to-"

"-What?" Alex said, her voice laced with sincere worry.

"I have to tell him something," Kara shook her head and looked away from her sister.

" _What?!_ " Alex said exasperatedly.

" _I have to tell him I love him, okay?!"_ Kara yelled suddenly, her eyes widening as she realized that sentence just came out of her mouth.

Alex blinked, her lips parting, "What?" she asked with a gentleness that Kara hadn't heard in a while.

"I have to tell him I'm in love with him." Kara said slowly, Alex gaping and lost for words.

"I-" she swallowed, "When did this happen?"

"I don't know," Kara shrugged helplessly, "I have _no_ idea."

"Then," Alex blinked, "how do you know? Did something happen?"

"The night they took him," she said slowly, "he told me he loved me." She looked up at her sister, tears springing to her eyes, her voice cracking as she next spoke, "And I couldn't say it back."

She burst into tears, and Alex rushed to her, "Oh, Kara," she said, pulling her sister into a hug,

"I should've said it back." she sobbed into Alex's shoulder, and she stroked Kara's hair reassuringly.

"You weren't ready," Alex said, "it's _okay_ , Kara."

"But I was!" Kara pulled away slightly so they could look each other in the eye, "The words were _right there_ , I just couldn't get them out."

Alex nodded, "I know," she brushed some hair off Kara's forehead.

"If I'd said something he wouldn't have left," She cried, "Cadmus wouldn't have him- _I_ would have him."

"Oh, Kara," Alex brought Kara into another hug, "it's not your fault."

"It _feels_ like my fault!" Kara sobbed into Alex's shirt.

"But it's _not_." Alex said, pulling away so they could look into each other's eyes, "I'm _sure_ he doesn't hold it against you."

Kara nodded and looked down at the ground, remaining in the half-hug. "What did Mon-El say?"

Kara sniffed pitifully, "Nothing." She said, "He got embarrassed and left."

"He thought he did something wrong by telling you his feelings?" Alex frowned sympathetically,

Kara nodded, "He seemed so worried that he'd done something wrong and by the time I thought enough about it, I was too late."

"It is a whole new concept to him." Alex said thoughtfully and Kara frowned,

"What do you mean?" She asked,

"Well," Alex began, "on Daxam, they had arranged marriages right?"

"Yeah," Kara said, realizing what her sister was saying.

"So the idea of finding someone you love is very new to him," Alex said, "it makes sense that he'd be so nervous to tell you, because he's never loved anyone like you before."

Kara smiled, blushing slightly, "Yeah," she nodded, "I guess you're right."

Alex pulled her close again, "Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"What do you mean?" Kara frowned into her sister's shoulder.

"Well," Alex began thoughtfully, "You've been walking around with this for months! I wish I could help you."

"You have," Kara said, pulling away and looking into Alex's deep brown eyes again, "You and Winn have been doing an _amazing_ job trying to find him-and you've been so patient with me-I couldn't be more thankful for all you've done."

"We're going to find him." Alex nodded, holding Kara's face and searching her eyes for some small bit of hope still left.

Kara nodded and Alex smiled her sad, reassuring, smile. They walked out into the hub again, and Kara once again thought about how ready she was to get rid of this weight inside of her.

* * *

She stepped away from Winn's side, where she'd been glued for the past three hours. She walked slowly down the hall and into the bathroom at the end of the corridor. She moved slowly inside, and to the sink, letting her hands hover under the cool stream of water.

She felt her phone buzz in her hand and she turned to it, picking it up excitedly. It was a notification about flash-floods in her area. She sighed and put it back down, looking at her reflection again.

"Don't do it." She said softly to herself.

She slowly unlocked the phone and stared at it. She knew that she shouldn't torture herself, but she couldn't stop. She tapped a name in her contacts and listened as the phone rang. She turned away from the mirror and leaned against the edge of the sink.

It dialed for a long moment, and she almost thought the person on the other end was going to pick up. He didn't.

" _Hey, you've reached Mon-El-"_

" _-Mike!"_

" _-Mike!"_ He repeated after her, clearing his throat and continuing, " _I'm not here right now so, leave me a message and Kara will help me figure out how to get back to you-"_

" _-Oh, you didn't need to say that-"_ She laughed in the background and he snorted softly.

" _Okay, so that's it._ "

" _Tell them to have a nice day!"_ Kara whispered.

" _Have a nice day!_ " he laughed and she chortled in the back. " _Well that was a mess-"_

The answering machine ended, and the mechanical voice came on after. She hung up and put the phone on the sink. She looked back at her reflection and stared into her eyes. They flickered back at her, and she found herself lost in her own thoughts.

" _KARA!_ " Alex burst into the bathroom, making her sister jump, " _Kara!_ "

"What?!" Kara held her chest,

"I think we've found him."


	3. Deadly

She landed heavily on the roof, a squad of DEO agents propelling down from helicopters around her. She marched forward, a monarch with an army on her heels. She yanked open the roof door and hopped over the banister. She floated down, looking at each floor for signs of life. She stopped at the bottom floor and walked forward. She hit the metal door with an open palm, and it went flying back, a dent in the surface the size of a crater.

She stepped inside, and an alarm started going off. She paused momentarily to look around the vast underground space. It was almost cavernous, standing tall above her head. Men came around the corner with weapons she didn't recognize. She jumped out of the way as they shot. She sped downwards, landing on top of one and punching the other. They both fell uselessly to the ground and she flipped her hair over her shoulder.

She marched through what seemed like scores of men, her sister and the DEO right behind her, picking up her scraps and finishing the job completely. Kara barely noticed. She didn't want to think about them-she didn't need to. All she needed was to find him.

She burst into a room that looked promising and found four empty cages. She walked over to them urgently, expecting for him to appear in one or the other, but he wasn't. She froze and turned, finding her sister in the doorway.

"He's not here," Kara said broken-heartedly, "come on."

She brushed past and Alex tried to stop her, "Kara-"

"- _UGH!_ " She bellowed, throwing a metal crate the size of a small sedan across the room.

" _Kara!_ " Alex screeched, " _Kara stop!_ "

She swallowed hard and stared at the box, and the cracks in the wall around it. She closed her eyes and squatted down, her cape floating down around her and gently falling to the ground. She covered her face and took a shaky breath.

Suddenly, soft in her ear, she heard a voice. It was so faint, like the last breath of a man on the eve of his death. The single word, calloused and frayed, brushed her sensitive ears, and she froze. Time stood still as that moment was stretched out into something much longer and more profound. It was a god send, and the word was the simplest call, and it said:

" _Kara,_ "

She stood straight up, sprinting down the hall, and following the sound of a weak heartbeat. She came to a dead end, finding shelves of supplies against a dank, metal wall. She hooked her hands around the edge of the scaffolding and yanked, pulling the piece away from the wall. It came to the ground with a deafening _crash_.

There was a door behind it, and although it was sealed shut. Kara's steady hands grabbed the latch and pulled with all their might. The door flew off it's hinges. She watched it fly past her, and then turned to the room. She stepped inside and looked around. It was huge, and dark. Something was dripping, she could hear it. She felt on the wall for a light switch, and then found one. The fluorescent lights flickered on, illuminating a scene she knew she wasn't going to forget for a long time to come.

In the center of the room, she saw a man she barely recognized; his skin was soaked in water and blood, his eyelids fluttering open and closed because he couldn't muster the strength to lift them any further.

Alex ran to her side and then stopped, as they both stared at the man hanging by his limbs in the center of that cell-like room.

" _Dad!_ " Alex breathed, running forward and trying to get the chains off of him.

Kara snapped out of her haze, rushing forward to help. She yanked the chains off his arms and Alex caught his weight, holding him up. Kara stepped back and watched them hug each other, her father barely conscious and her sister barely keeping it together. Kara watched it and felt happiness, and the bitter aftertaste of disappointment. She hated that she felt like that, but she couldn't help it; finding Jeremiah had always been, in the back of her mind, a goal they might never achieve, and suddenly now, if the impossible was possible, than maybe what she thought was possible was really the opposite.

* * *

She stood next to her sister, above her adoptive father's bed, as Eliza checked on him. There was an air of serendipity in the room, the Danvers were glowing collectively, Eliza brushing the hair gently off his forehead. She looked up at her daughters and smiled,

"Thank you," She exhaled, and the two girls beamed.

"Tell us when he wakes up, okay?" Alex said, turning to guide her sister out of the room, to which Eliza nodded.

They walked outside the infirmary and turned to each other. They grinned, and Alex began to cry again, throwing her arms about Kara's neck and pulling her into a hug,

"Oh, Kara," she sniffled, "I'm so happy."

Kara closed her eyes, a feeling like a warm glow beginning to ignite in her gut. "I am too." she beamed, pulling her sister closer.

Alex pulled away, "We're going to find Mon-El, alright? We will."

Kara nodded, smiling as convincingly as she could, "I know."

Alex beamed and wiped a tear off her cheek, "Oh god," she laughed, "I gotta go get a tissue,"

"Go!" Kara laughed, watching her sister run off.

"Kara!" She turned to see her mother leaning outside the infirmary door, "He's awake!"

Kara ran over and her mother stopped her before she entered, "Where's your sister?"

"Bathroom-do you want me to go get her?"

"No, no," her mother smiled, "I'll go. You keep your father company."

Kara nodded and walked inside. Her father opened his eyes fully for the first time, and his face broke into a teary smile, " _Kara,_ " he breathed.

She beamed, moving closer and hugging him. He chuckled and patted her back. She pulled away and they smiled at each other for a long moment.

"How are you feeling?" She asked gently.

"Much better," he said contently, "now that I'm here, and your beautiful mother has tended to me."

Kara laughed and looked down at her clasped hands in front of her. She smiled at them for a long moment.

"I met someone while they had me," he said, "someone I'd met before."

She looked slowly up at him, her heart racing in her chest, "Who?" she asked breathlessly.

"The man who was with you when I helped you escape Cadmus all those months ago," He said, barely able to keep his eyes open for more than a few seconds. He swallowed, "Mon-El."

Her lips parted and she clenched her hands harder, stepping closer to his bed, "Do you know where he is?"

He shook his head slowly, "No," She looked down at her hands again and leaned back on her heels.

"He talked a lot about you though," He said, "he was _convinced_ that you were going to find him. It didn't matter what they did to him, because he knew that you were going to find him."

Kara swallowed, _hard_. She both wanted and didn't want to hear this; it both reaffirmed her belief in her own abilities if he still believed in her, but it also made her feel inadequate for not finding him soon enough.

"Don't give up on him," Jeremiah said, "not yet."

Kara looked up, "Never."


	4. Disappear

She raced through the air, her face set with firm concentration. With their leader behind bars, she'd cut off the head of Cadmus, and she knew that they were flailing around, trying desperately to stay alive. She wasn't going to lose hope, and she wasn't going to let anything distract her from herself; she loved Mon-El, but she knew that he'd want her to look for him while also doing the work she taught him to do. It wasn't a betrayal to concentrate on other things, to sleep in her own bed, to leave her coat on the floor; it was not hallowed ground she could not walk on, but better still: pockets of energy she could draw from.

She landed in the DEO and walked down the stairs. "What else have you got?" She smiled, and Winn spun around in his chair, beaming uncontrollably.

" _That's_ my girl!" He yelled, high-fiving her as she moved to stand next to him, "That was _amazing,_ Kara!"

She smiled, "Thanks, Winn."

"Alright so we have nothing yet, but I do have some popcorn in the microwave..." He grinned and she smiled,

"I demand that you go get it." She said teasing him, to which he laughed and jumped up, running to the break room.

She smiled and sat down in his chair. She sighed and stared up at the ceiling. Her eyes traveled to the moonlit balcony across the hall, and she paused for a moment. She remembered her bleary dream, the image of Mon-El standing atop those stairs and staring out into the black abyss of the night. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Maybe if she fell asleep she'd dream of him again.

Suddenly, there was a loud beeping from Winn's computer, and she turned to see a red light blinking on the screen. She jumped up and squinted, looking at where it was.

She jumped into the air. She flew out of the DEO just as Winn came back with the popcorn.

"Kara-?" He frowned, then he saw the the computer, "- _oh crap!_ " He fumbled with his headset and finally getting it on spoke again, "Kara! Kara, I'm back! I've got you; tell me what you see when you get there!"

"Will do." she called darkly over the wind.

* * *

He could hardly see where he was going. Everything was dark. His face was numb, his feet stumbling through the maze of tunnels. His breath was labored, his head was foggy. All he knew was he had to get out of there.

He came to a door, and fumbled with the keycard he'd stolen off a guard who hadn't been looking. The metal lifted slowly, and as soon as he could, he dove under it. He used the key on the other side to close it behind him. He sprinted forward. He came to another door, and he did the same as the first one.

Beyond it, there were two guards. They began shooting at him. He dove forward, knocking one against the wall. He blurred over to the other one, took his gun, and bent it in half. The man's eyes filled with terror, and he had a sudden, sick, rush flow through his body.

He grabbed the guard's face in one palm, and slammed him against the control panel of the next door. The metal barrier creaked open slowly, and he realized it was the last one in his way.

Against his skin, he felt the midnight air. As he stepped outside, the desert stars bent down to kiss him. He ran up the slope outside the base's doors, and fell to his knees. He inhaled the first breath of a newly freed man. He closed his eyes and felt himself falling. He knew he needed to keep going, but all he had was spent inside those haunted walls. He fell onto his hands, and watched as his heavy breaths moved the sand beneath him.

He fell onto his side, and looked up. As the world went dark again, an angel came down from the heavens, a red cape flowing about them, and he watched as they landed. They stood in front of him, and faced an army of his oppressors, leaving the building to chase after him. He looked up, and saw through the night, clear blue eyes, coming to lead him home.

* * *

Mon-El's eyes didn't open when he first woke up. He felt so tired, all he wanted was to sleep. His dreams had been filled with a heavenly voice, calling his name and telling him to hold on still. Suddenly, he heard a noise like a soft snore. He opened his eyes carefully, waiting to see something horrid on the other side; what he found was much nicer.

Kara sat slumped in a chair next to his bed, her head laying back against her shoulder and the edge of the chair. He watched her for a long moment until she jerked awake. She gasped and sat up, looking around.

"Hey," he said weakly.

" _Mon-El!_ " She cried, jumping up, almost tackling him in a hug.

He smiled and ran one hand up her spine to rest in between her shoulder blades, pausing there and pulling her as close as he could without causing himself further harm.

"God, I missed you." He breathed into her hair and she shuddered, laughing into his shoulder. She pulled back slightly and they looked at each other lovingly, "I knew you'd find me."

She beamed, stroking his cheek lightly. "I'm so glad I did."

"Well that's a relief," he sighed and she laughed. He watched her toss her head forward with a look of awe; he had missed her laugh- _making_ her laugh.

She sighed happily and looked back at him. She looked down at her hands, which had-on their own-found his. She swallowed and he frowned.

"Kara?" He asked gently and she looked up at him, "You okay?"

She nodded, "Yeah." She squeezed his hand, "I am now."

* * *

Kara rolled over in her sleep. Her palm stretched out across the sheets, searching. She came up empty. She opened her eyes and sat up slowly. All the covers had fallen off her side of the bed-she hogged them-and her bed was devoid of anything except herself.

She stepped out of bed and walked into the living room. She looked around and saw a man on the balcony. His broad back was to her, his skin glistening in the city lights. She smiled and slinked over to him.

"Hey," she breathed, crossing her arms and leaning into his side.

"Hey," he smiled, draping an arm around her shoulders, "what're you doing up?"

"What're _you_ doing up?" She countered, tearing her eyes away from the city to look at him.

He shrugged, "I just wanted to look at what I was missing all those months."

She snored and he laughed, "What?" he said indignantly,

"Nothing," she said, "continue."

"I really like the city now," he said, "it was the thing I missed the second most."

She laughed and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, turning away and blushing.

"I missed you the most." He explained quickly and she laughed,

"Yeah, I got that." She laughed and he smiled.

"Mon-El," she looked down at her hands, "about the night before you were kidnapped-"

"-Oh, we don't need to-" he shook his head,

"-But I _want_ to." She interrupted, looking up at him.

He nodded, looking down and pulling his hand away.

"There's something I've been wanting to say to you for a while now," she began slowly and he nodded, looking concerned,

"Okay..."

"I love you too." She said.

His eyes widened and he looked up to her. He looked back and forth between her eyes and found that she was being earnest.

"Wow," he said, "I didn't know it would feel like that."

"Like what?" She smiled, cocking her head to the side.

"Like..." He made so vague hand movements up and down his chest and she lost it, laughing at him and pressing her head to his chest.

He laughed as well, wrapping his arms about her and pulling her close. She lifted her head and smiled up at him.

"I missed you too," she said and he bent down slightly to press a soft kiss to her lips.

"Mm.." he hummed, pulling away, "I missed _that_."

"Oh yeah?" She laughed, leading him back into the living room,

"Mhm," he smiled,

"Then come here," she laughed.

* * *

 _ **Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the wonderful comments and feedback! This is the end of the story, thank you so much for reading!**_


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